All the Social Distances You Need – Kim Allen

Roll up, roll up have I got a bargain for you

All the social distances you need

Measures for all.

A size that fits

For you, and you and you and you

Let’s start with something simple

Just half as long as a Volkswagen Beetle

The length of a King size bed

9/10 as tall as an artificial Christmas tree

1 and 1/5 times as tall as Napoleon

What about some landmarks?

1/25 as tall as Nelson’s column

1/30 as tall as the leaning tower of Pisa

1/45 as tall as the statue of liberty

1/50 as tall as Big Ben

For the golfers 40 times as tall as a golf tee

And the plane spotters

1/35 the wingspan of a 747

Any hairdressers?

20,000 times the thickness of a strand of hair

Something for everyone

0.000000005 times the distance from the earth to the moon.

1,500 times the length of a grain of sand.

1,000, 000 times the length of an E.coli bacterium.

1, 500,000,000 times the length of a glucose molecule

You at the back

Yes you

What does that add up to?

Give the girl a prize

15 people in a queue

Kim Allen